It’s Code Orange again, and the headlines are all Trump Trumpety Trump 24/7 once more, with news of our attention-freak president eclipsing the continuing devastation of a slow-moving Tropical Storm Florence, 3 mass shootings (thoughts & prayers… next!), Tropical Stormy Daniels, and a very Trumpian sex abuse scandal involving his Supreme Court nominee Judge Brett Kavanaugh.

Trump somehow made storm after storm all about himself, putting to rest any talk he was losing his edge. This was also the week of the TMI President, thanks to a porn star.

Friday morning saw 2 major storms make landfall in America, with Hurricane Florence pounding the South Atlantic States, while convicted felon and former Trump Campaign Manager Paul Manafort shook the foundations of government in Washington D.C. with the staggering news that he will indeed be cooperating with Special Counsel Robert Mueller as part of his guilty plea to over a dozen felonies to go with his 8 other convictions.

The plea deal is a remarkable document that gives Robert Mueller carte blanche to question Mueller about anything he’s ever done and anyone he did it with, granting Federal investigators and prosecutors full access to any and all documents, files, computers, cell phones emails, text messages, tapes and/or any other evidence in his possession.

And speaking of un-indicted coconspirators (and we always seem be, don’t we?), Manafort’s apartment in Trump Tower now belongs to the Justice Department as part of the $46 million in money and assets he surrendered.
The Manafort bombshell sent the White House into High Spin Cycle, saying in a dozen ways that the Manafort plea has nothing to do with Trump’s 2016 victory or the President himself (Paul Who?), in spite of the fact that Manafort was Trump’s campaign manager and a man with extensive ties to both powerful politicians and criminals in Russia (those two elements of society being inextricably intertwined in Russia, a situation that inspired the working model for the Trump Administration).

To counter all the hosannah-singing and dancing in at the streets over the Manafort news by the president’s enemies (most of the nation), Trump announced he will release to the public (on the advice of (!) 3 Fox News hosts) selected documents from the politically compromised Senate Intelligence Committee instigation into Russian Collusion, over the objections of the FBI and every USA intelligence-gathering agency that this could compromise intelligence operations and put the lives American covert operatives and their contacts in grave danger.

This forced Trump to weigh endangering the lives of American personnel and sabotaging sensitive intelligence operations against the personal benefits to him of further muddying the waters in the minds of Americans about his alleged Russia collusion to steal the 2016 election. But who are we kidding here? Of course he came out squarely in favor of his own self-interest over National Security, and doubled down on his threats to declassify the material. Trump has shown himself to be remarkably consistent in making such decisions.

Then on Monday a third major storm hit America. Actually it was a Stormy, as in porn star and Trump’s former lover Stormy Daniels, who released her tell-all book “Full Disclosure” on Monday, which brings us to the Too Much Information part of the TMI President. Americans were treated to the news that the president’s penis is smallish, grotesque and malformed, as Ms Daniels described the most unpleasant 2 minutes of her life in this passage: “I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart.”

Somewhere Yeti is wondering what he ever did to be compared to such an odious creature.

To vent his anger, Trump decided to impose more tariffs on China and put an annual cap on accepting refugees at 30,000, a record low for America, then gave a clinic on how to make a devastating natural disaster all about him. His strategy? Saying incredibly stupid things about the storm that people would talk about more than the storm itself, such as “This was a bad hurricane, one the wettest we’ve seen in terms of water.” Wellokaythen!

On Wednesday the President headed to North Carolina to complete the job of saying incredibly stupid shit to distract us from the harsh realities of death and destruction, and he did not disappoint. To a man looking over his destroyed house and whose insurance company was refusing to honor their policy, Trump said “At least you got a nice boat out of the deal,” referring to someone else’s boat that had washed into his yard from far away. He then compounded his uncomfortably inappropriate remarks by obsessing about the boat in the guy’s yard for 10 minutes, before telling the stunned and stricken crowd “Have a good time!”

Naturally that got the whole country talking about his inane gibberish, and not talking about Trump taking away billions of dollars from Cancer and AIDS research to fund his Kiddie Koncentration Kamps, allowing Russian spy planes full access to American airspace, and telling the Spanish Foreign Minister to (!) “build a wall around the Sahara Desert” to solve their immigration problems since the Sahara (!) “can’t be as long as our border with Mexico.” Apparently no one told him that the Sahara is (A) not in Europe, where Spain has always been located, and (B) over 1,000 miles longer than our Mexican border, and any “wall around it,” would have to be 8,200 miles long and violate the territory of 12 sovereign nations in Africa. You know, little details like that…

Also lost in the sauce was Trump’s former personal lawyer, fixer and bagman Michael Cohen singing like Sinatra to Robert Mueller in “multiple interviews” over the past week or so, keeping up his end of his plea bargain to spill the beans on Trump about Russia.

What people did talk about, however, is the high drama involving Trump’s Supreme Court nominee, Federal Judge Brett Kavanaugh, not because he lied to Congress during his Confirmation Hearing, or the discovery that he has a serious gambling habit, but (something right up Trump’s alley), an accusation of sexual assault made by a high school classmate, now a professor in California.

Taking their cue from The Trump Way of handling sex abuse accusations, every Republican member of the Senate Judiciary Committee viciously attacked the woman and denied her the same FBI investigation that Anita Hill got as a matter of course when she was in the same situation 30 year ago, vividly illustrating some of the reasons why so many women do not report sexual attacks. This emboldened Trump’s vile supporters to viciously harass the woman, sending multiple death threats and forcing her and her family to move out of their home.

Trump himself shocked everybody by not attacking the woman, for once acting respectful and circumspect towards her, happy to let her allegations face the inevitable scrutiny and allow the process to unfold in a timely and orderly manner. So taken aback were members of his staff and conservative pundits that they heaped an incredible amount of praise on Trump for acting normal for a change, to the point where Trump felt compelled to boast about his humility.

Of course that lasted only a day before he stuck his foot right back in his mouth and publicity questioned the word of a woman who had passed a polygraph test, saying “if it was so serious an attack, why didn’t she report it?”

He knows damned well why, since he has for many years been aggressively demonizing his own victims, and that the more publicly traumatized and humiliated he can make them, the less likely it becomes that future victims of sexual attacks will speak out. No victim of sexual assault survives the encounter unchanged, and for a president to increase their trauma for his own gain is diabolical, despicable and… having run out out negative adjectives for the man… Trumpian, leaving me no choice but to leave you with a joke:

Q: What’s the difference between Yeti and Donald Trump?
A: One is an oversized inarticulate anthropoid with matted stringy hair and a small, toadstool-like penis, and the other is Yeti.


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