One day there you are circling the sun as usual, minding your own and keeping your appointed heavenly rounds, proudly bearing the honor of being the outermost planet in the Solar System, and the next day you’re a nobody, a glorified asteroid, a planetoid! Dwarf Planet at best. Ouch. Let’s rally ’round our old friend Pluto on
NATIONAL PLUTO DEMOTED DAY!
Sixteen years ago today, scientists were all “Pluto’s too tiny to be a planet,” and Pluto was like “WTF, I’m good enough to name Mickey Mouse’s dog after, but I can’t be a planet anymore?”
The rest of us were crestfallen that instead of living in a nine planet Solar System, we were demoted to inhabiting a mere eight planet system, a clear snub and an affront to polite society.
What the hell is a “planetoid” anyway? Sounds like a painful sore.
In the time from its discovery in 1938 until we kicked Pluto to the curb in 2006, it had barely completed one season in its 248-year orbit of the Sun.
Scientists better beware when dwarf spaceships full of angry Plutonians show up asking whose bright idea it was to demote their planet. Pluto, we hardly knew ye. Let’s have a rousing cheer for the Ninth Stone From The Sun!
•Suggested Activities: Circling the perimeter resentfully.