Okay, let’s get this straight. It’s not Mexican Independence Day or even a major Mexican holiday, since Cinco de Mayo is celebrated mostly in the Mexican state of Puebla, commemorating an obscure battle that had zip to do with Mexican Independence, making today
NATIONAL LET’S PRETEND TO CARE ABOUT MEXICAN HISTORY DAY!
What we’re left with is an excuse to guzzle beer and tequila, eat tacos, behave badly and wish puzzled Mexicans a Happy Independence Day.
We never remember the real Mexican Independence Day on September 16, so Cinco de Mayo is basically one more American national keg party, with spicier food than usual.
Any wonder we’re considered the Worst Neighbors Ever to our southern friends, a country that never did us any harm in spite of America stealing half their territory? Skip the piñatas too, they’re for Christmas and children’s birthdays.
•Suggested Activities: Tearing down the Great Wall of Arizona.