Irony in revolution? In Iran, a nation held responsible for funding all kinds of terrorists, a suicide bomber struck their elite Revolutionary Guard, killing over 30 people including 5 top Guard commanders. Can’t say that came out of nowhere, can they? Iranians have been chafing under their religious nut job government for quite some time and the latest election fraud seems to have been the straw that broke the Mullah’s back. Surely the retribution by the Revolutionary Guard will be brutal and over the top, thus fueling the rebellion against the regime.

Unfortunately for the majority of Iranians, who are not religious nut jobs, the people responsible for bombing the religious nut jobs are a new set of religious nut jobs, some bunch of jackasses calling themselves “The Army of God.” Great, just what the world needs, another army of God doing devilish things. If the majority of Iranian people don’t get involved, they might wind up with something worse than what they’ve got, maybe a Taliban type of government.

They’ve already demonstrated poor planning skills in their last revolution when they overthrew the Shah and wound up with Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomenei, a bloodthirsty maniac masquerading as a man of God. That evil old fart tried to usher in the 14th century to a modern and sophisticated country, sending the nation’s Jews into exile for fear of their lives after living there peacefully for thousands of years, chopping off hands and heads and generally instituting a New Spanish Inquisition, Ayatollah style. He also presided over a 10 year war with Iraq, who wasn’t buying his call for revolution in every Muslim nation.

Khomenei finally dropped dead and was immediately deified, but there was still no relief in sight for Iran since he was replaced by another crazy Ayatollah named Ali Khamenei who thought his predecessor’s ideas were just peachy. Under his watch Iran has been funding terrorists and trying to become the dominant voice in the Middle East and also the entire Muslim world. Just like Iraq in 1980, there aren’t many buyers for turning back the calendar to the Middle Ages and chopping off heads and hands and stoning people to death because it is such good sport.

So if this suicide attack on the Revolutionary Guard is the beginning of a revolution in Iran, their incumbent government will get little sympathy or support from the rest of the world. But pity the people of Iran, who did nothing to deserve any of this. Iran is Persia, as ancient a civilization as there is on this earth, at one time a repository of science, scholarship and cosmopolitan tolerance. After a long decline under a series of Islamic dynasties, in 1925 Reza Khan overthrew the Qajar Dynasty and declared himself Shah. He instituted a system of industrialization, education and railroad construction that set Iran on the path to becoming a modern nation.

Their vast petroleum reserves made them an important and wealthy nation, especially after they wrested their oil industry away from foreign corporations. Khan’s son Shah Reza Pahlavi was briefly deposed for oppposing this oil industry nationalization before being reinstated with help from America under Eisenhower, the thinking being that he was the least troublesome of a sorry lot of Iranian leaders. Shah Pahlavi modernized Iraq’s infrastructure and expanded education, but like any monarch his rule was strict and autocratic and eventually he had to go. That’s where Khomenei came in, making the Shah look like benevolence personified by comparison, and it’s been a downhill slide for Iran ever since. Who knows who will replace the savage buffoons running the show there?

There’s still Pahlavi’s son, Shah the Third, or whatever he calls himself, living in exile and waiting to return to the throne in glory to the cheers of the masses like many an exiled king throughout history, but he’s better advised to keep living off the family wealth in playboy/king mode in Maryland where he lives. The time of monarchs is all but over and he probably likes his head to remain attached to his neck instead of rolling across some stadium floor for the entertainment of religious whack jobs. It’s not like the Iranian people are looking forward to trading in one despot for another.

Who gets to run Iran after they overthrow the Medieval Mullahs is anyone’s guess. What is a sure thing, though, is that the Middle East is fulfilling its role in the world, showing us all how not to behave and how not to run a country or interact with a regional community of nations. The tribalism, the undisguised hatred and the callous and cynical misuse of religion has made the area a chaotic wreck for thousands of years. Looks like things are going to get worse (if that’s even possible) before they get better in that tortured corner of the world. Let’s hope that the Iranian people work to form a tolerant and law-abiding government and seek no vengeance on anyone. Hopefully they will tell the phony God guys that their assistance is not needed, you can go home now, but thanks anyway.

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