Scientists have discovered that the active ingredient in Marijuana, THC, is an effective antibacterial agent. Put this one right up there with red wine being a valuable source of anti-oxidants (Whatever they are, and who cares?) and you've got a brand new justification for getting comfortably numb. Researchers point out that THC is effective against drug-resistant strains of bacteria, but more study is needed to evaluate the long-term benefits. Since making this announcement they have been beating back the volunteers from their laboratory doors.

Word on the scientific street is that wind power is the wave of the future, to which Holland replied: Hellloooo!

It has been announced that land on the Moon and on Mars can be offered for sale. Act now and they'll throw in the Brooklyn Bridge and set of stainless steel steak knives.

Scientists have announced as a revelation what everybody else always knew: that "clean coal" is a contradiction in terms. That's understandable, since scientists tend not to have been English majors in school. However, the whole idea of burying the Co2 emissions in the ground through gas-capturing technology makes it more expensive than burning fifty-dollar bills as a source of energy. Maybe a minor in economics wouldn't have hurt.

Ms. Heidi B. Hammel has made it her mission in life to learn all she can about the icy planets Neptune and Uranus and to share those findings with the rest of us. Which sort of makes you glad that someone's on the ball with that. Someone else, that is.

In more self-justification science news the word is that cheating husbands can now blame their DNA. A gene variant, or allele, is present in 2 out of 5 men and makes them more prone to marital discord, infidelity and divorce. Researchers are working feverishly to come up with a scientific excuse for the other 3 out 5.

Scientists have discovered that a robot can learn to fly a helicopter better than a human. Big deal. Get back to us when you have a robot who can do the housework and figure out income tax returns.

Space observers have noted that some galaxies have evicted their black holes, those star and planet-eating voids weighing millions of times more than our sun and creating a greater gravitational pull than a bar room floor to the town drunk. So now these black holes roam open space in search of a meal. Other scientists have proposed sending earth's huge poodle and celebrity surplus to these black holes for a win-win solution for both parties.

Great. Now some science guys in Vienna want an internet with Quantum physics codes to protect our privacy. Most of us would rather face identity theft than be forced to learn Quantum mathematics.

Still other scientists in America have detected a profound disturbance in The Force. Oh, wait, that would be the Sci-fi geeks with large collections of light sabers and Chewbacca masks but no girlfriends.

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